Words of Comfort

Well, I'm back. My original intention was to take some time off from blogging to work through some of the issues that Carey and I have encountered recently. However, I kept finding myself making notes of stuff I wanted to blog about. I realized that perhaps blogging is going to be one of the things that helps me deal with my pain and move forward in my healing. So, rather than remaining in my self-imposed blogging exile, I'm returning to one of things that brings me joy.

Over the past week, I have found God acting in our lives more than I would have thought possible. And truly, it has been amazing. Rather than feeling angry about the situation and asking why God would allow this to happen to me, I have found great comfort in the knowledge that nothing just "happens." That makes God sound like a passive observer, instead of the author of all things. I don't know why things happen, but that's not my job. It's not my responsibility to try and figure out why something happened or question why it happened to me. Instead, I've found that it is my comfort to know that God has walked with us every step of this journey and has placed so many wonderful people in our lives to wrap us in love and strength and support.

Every day, I receive a daily devotional email from Proverbs 31 Ministries called Encouragement for Today. Last Wednesday, the devotion reflected on Deuteronomy 33:12: Let the beloved of the Lord rest secure, in him, for he shields him all day long, and the one the Lord loves rests between his shoulders. The writer shares the story of losing a treasured possession, but says that the verses that she shares can speak to many types of loss: a relationship, a home, a friend or family member. She shares Psalm 73, Verse 23: Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. She goes on to state that fear and frustration become faith when we recognize God's presence, even in times of hardship and loss. The timing of this devotion was perfect - once again, God was reminding me that He is here with me, walking with us every step of the way, guiding our steps with care and comforting us with His love.

This morning on the train ride into work, I was trying to get caught up on some of my book club reading. The new selection for the Bloom book club is Strong Women, Soft Hearts: A Woman's Guide to Cultivating a Wise Heart and a Passionate Life by Paula Rinehart. In the chapter on Trust, Paula writes: "...accepting the mystery of what we cannot know leads us to the heart of God where we trade our craving for explanation for a simple willingness to trust (page 81). I know that I'm not there yet, but I feel the need for understanding slipping away and being slowly replaced by the willingness to trust in His plan.

Yesterday also saw the arrival of a package that I was eagerly awaiting. You may remember that, at the start of the year, I participated in the Bible in 90 Days Challenge, hosted by Amy at Mom's Toolbox. Amy is planning on hosting the challenge again starting July 5th. Once again, I felt that God was calling me to participate in the challenge and see how reading His Word would affect my life. So, in preparation for taking the challenge again, I ordered a copy of the official Bible in 90 Days NIV Bible, the Participant Guide, and a book entitled The Essential Bible Companion: Key Insights for Reading God's Word. (Please note: none of these purchases were necessary. I completed the challenge earlier this year using just my Bible and a reading schedule that I printed from the Bible in 90 Days website. I just decided that, since I wanted to participate in the challenge again and see what new insights God would be sending my way, I wanted to approach the challenge differently. So, I thought making use of these resources might allow me to reap new benefits from the challenge.) Well, my package arrived yesterday, and I can't wait for July 5th to roll around! I was already cracking open my books last night, despite the fact that it was after midnight and I really should have been sleeping! I can't wait to begin this journey again with the wonderful group of ladies who will be reading along with Amy. Anyone else feeling up to the challenge???

It feels good to be back on the blog. :-) Thank you so much for your continued thoughts and prayers. As I said before, it has become so evident to Carey and I that we are surrounded by amazing people who offer their love, support and prayers so unconditionally that it has made us feel incredibly blessed, even in the face of hardship. I don't think I will ever find the words to tell you how thankful we are...